Week-long parody

26 October 2005     •     Comments Off on Week-long parody
Daily Dose

Sorry I haven’t been updating this blog guys! I’ve been sick the past week, and now I think my video card is sick too. Not to mention my Yahoo Messenger (I swear, it’s freaking out on me!). These cumulative PC issues have been making it difficult for me to work properly this week. It’s a good thing I’ve already made it a habit to press CTRL+S (shortcut for Save), or I’d probably have to re-do a lot of designs and animations. My computer hangs just when I’m beginning to be really into my work. Now how annoying is that?

I went to the World’s Longest Buffet, and it made me feel even sicker than I already was. I think Eastwood City underestimated the hungry people too much. Marc and I spent Php350 each for tiny cheesecakes, dry pasta (ugh!), and a few pieces of Kikiam (for crying out loud, I can buy those in UP for only 10 bucks!). That 350 ticket was so not worth it. It’s a rip-off!!! I had a feeling that the place would be full of people, but I wanted to be part of that “record-breaking” crap so we went. Well, it was record-breaking all right… A record-breaking rip-off, a record-breaking long WAIT, and a record-breaking waste of money.

A good thing happened during the week though. Dad and I decided to surrender my insurance and Joyce’s. It earned a sizeable amount, enough for us to pay for bills and medicinal expenses till probably January. I won’t be totally uninsured though… Those insurance plans that we surrendered had my mom and dad as beneficiaries. Dad and I thought it would be better if I got a different insurance policy, and have Joyce as my beneficiary this time. Anyway, Dad lent me some cash so I could upgrade my PC. ) Not to brag or anything, my system is pretty high-end already as compared to regular home PCs, but it’s still lagging behind for the type of usage I’m putting it through, particularly, my job. My PC is on practically the whole day everyday, and I won’t be surprised if it was overheating that is causing my video card problem.

Oh by the way… I got mad at Choknat a few days ago. I bought a do-it-yourself hot oil treatment for my hair, and it required me to wear a shower cap while it sets. Would you believe Choknat didn’t recognize me?! I was working on my PC with the cap on, and Choknat was actually GROWLING at me (like he does at Marc) while sitting on MY bed (the ungrateful prick!). I told him to shut up, but he just kept on growling for a few minutes until he realized that it WAS me under the cap. Do you know what he did? He got up from the bed and gave me a doggy sorry ) He stood on his hind legs, placed his front paws on my thigh, and gave me doggy kisses on the side of my face (eww). See? I have a sweet dog. He’s a gay dog, that’s for sure, but he’s still sweet.

Sheero and Harry, on the other hand, are battling it out for the position of sleeping on the left side of my pillow. Choknat’s content on sleeping by my feet, but these two just can’t sleep properly if they don’t have a pillow under their heads. The little spoiled brats! D

Anyway, I’ve updated the poll (finally). Sorry it’s a bit late… But then again, better late than never, right? ) Oh, by the way, do check out my favorite doggies on Dogster.Com! I’ve recently updated Harry, Choknat, and Sheero’s pages.

Birthday presents

18 October 2005     •     Comments Off on Birthday presents
Family Stuff

I told you I wanted to do this topic justice, and create an entire entry about it.

Ok, I admit. Call me sentimental, but talking about what I got for my birthday makes me a bit teary-eyed. They’re probably the best presents I ever received.

Marc got me a pair of funky earrings, and spent the entire day with me. My dad cooked one of my favorite dishes: Sweet and Sour Pork, just for me. He cooked it for lunch, but I was asleep because I had to work late the night before, so he kept it in the fridge for me until I wake up. They didn’t even touch it, because they said it was my dad’s gift for me. My sister gave me a homemade card. She’s still not as OK as before (she still laughs over nothing and does some pretty weird things), so our maid helped her with the card. My mom gave me pastries that were given to her (she wasn’t allowed to eat them, but she didn’t want to part with them either so I was really touched she gave it to me).

So maybe we’re broke. It’s a real drag seeing our earnings go straight to medicine expenses, but hey, we’re happy. During my birthday, my mom cried without pissing me off. Crying has become a habit for her already, and it can get pretty annoying. But on my birthday, I understood why she cried. She had a reason to, a REAL reason to. She was crying and saying sorry to me, and gesturing to the pastries she gave. My dad and I knew what she was saying: she was sorry that it was all that she can give me. I told her to think nothing of it, I’m already 24, I have a job, and I should be the one treating them out. My dad and I didn’t want my birthday to be one sad cry-fest, so he helped me tell her not to be bothered by it. There are people with the same birthday as I do, but unlike me, they don’t even have anything to eat, let alone have pastries and sweet and sour pork.

What my mom doesn’t realize (but I’m sure my dad does) is that this is probably the best birthday I’ve had in two years. Two years ago, we spent my birthday at my grandma’s wake. I was her favorite granddaughter, so losing her a few days before my birthday was extra painful. Then last year, I spent my birthday only with Marc, Mommy, and Dad. Joyce, my younger sister, was admitted to the Metro Psych facility at that time. We weren’t allowed to see her, because that time was a critical period for her according to her psychiatrist.

Maybe I’m just a simple person, but really, this birthday was way better than those I’ve had during the past two years (and years before that too, because at that time, we really couldn’t celebrate due to the simple reason that Joyce was still very violent). Or maybe that I’ve gone through so much that my priorities have changed. I guess that really happens if you’re suddenly plunged into an unavoidable responsibility. When I really think about it, I don’t really have to do this. I’m earning enough to be able to live comfortably on my own with my three dogs, and have more than enough for leisure that most people my age would love to brag about. But I choose not to. I choose to stay here with my family, and help my dad through this financial crisis. My dad really isn’t obliging me to stay, but I honestly don’t think I’ll be able to live with my self knowing that I left my family in such difficult times. It’s my choice, and I’m pretty sure this choice will lead me to something good, somewhere along the way.

Ok, enough drama. I’m starting to feel guilty for spending Php3,000 on my hair again. I only spend that much on vanity once a year (specifically during my birthdays). Marc said that I deserve to treat my self at least once in a while. Maybe I do, but STILL. 3,000 bucks for hair tint, highlights, and haircut. My friends say it’s already a good deal, considering how thick and long my hair is, but I still feel guilty spending that much on vanity. Marc said that I should consider it my birthday gift to my self, and it’s an occasional (if not rare) treat I give my self for the work I’ve been doing. Maybe he’s right. I guess the only reason I felt a bit bad about it afterwards is that I should have bought that way cool Thermaltake aluminum casing instead. Well, I’m weird that way. Or maybe I’m just too practical. Hehe. It bugs me whenever I spend on something that’s not beneficial to my job in some way. My hair has absolutely nothing to do with my job. I really can’t see a practical reason for it, but I got to admit spending on vanity for once felt good. Maybe that’s what Marc wants me to do and feel: do something brainless and vain for a change. Too much work and thinking too much about work can be bad for one’s health… and sanity.

Speaking of brainless jobs… I gave my dogs a bath last Sunday. They were PISSED, especially after I started locking them up in the garden to dry off. I think for once they actually felt that they were dogs, not pretend-humans. Anyway, they got over their bad moods when Dad had Marlyn (our maid) cook fried chicken wings. They were back to their old sweet AND cunning selves (not to mention sun-dried furs), trying to weedle chicken scraps from us. Well, they totally forgot they were given baths! LOL.

That’s it for now! See you.

When passion becomes a profession

13 October 2005     •     Comments Off on When passion becomes a profession
Daily Dose

No, no. This isn’t an R-18 entry. Haha, what were you thinking?! Seriously though, I think a lot of you can relate to this.

If you’ve read my personal site (the Flash one) from start to finish, you’ll know that I started web/graphics design as a hobby. I got so passionate with it at the start that I got to the point of missing meals just to learn new software or to work on a digital art work. Never in my life did I imagine I’d be doing this full-time, not just 8am-5pm full-time, but practically 24/7.

I’ve always imagined myself in a corporate setting, an artist of some sort in an ad agency or something. Or maybe even doing layouts for a newspaper or magazine. Web was a bit farther off my mind… I honestly never saw it as a money-making endeavor. After all, most of the web projects I did before were practically free (I can’t believe I charged them THAT low!), if not free. I only got real taste of freelancing with print-related projects. But what am I doing now? I’m a Creative Director for an advertising company I partly own, which focuses web-related services. And web projects probably compose more than half of what’s in my portfolio. Well, it’s not that far from what I dreamed to be doing (it’s still an ad agency), but I really never thought Web would be my focus… It was more of a hobby for me.

I’m not complaining or anything, I absolutely LOVE what I’m doing. Not many people can say that about their jobs, so I guess I’m one of the lucky few. But sometimes, I have to admit, it’s not that easy. A passion turned profession, it would seem like heaven for workaholics like me, but not quite so. There are times I miss this passion being just plain passion, no deadlines, no requirements, no nagging clients, and no revisions.

An artistic profession is probably romanticized a bit too much by many. Creating an art that actually sells might be the greatest ambitions of some. It was my ambition, continues to be, will most likely ALWAYS be. But sometimes, the realities of life just happen to take that romanticism away. Your bills become overdue, you don’t have enough for spending on luxuries, and you just happen to need money to buy medicine for your mom and sister. My dad and I go through this all the time, when we have to give up “art for art’s sake.” You come to a point where you have to bend to a client’s request, no matter how awfully ugly you think his suggestion is. Especially if he’s willing to pay more. That’s where the artist’s dilemma comes in. Either you sacrifice your art or let your family starve. You create an ugly, messy piece of work that you don’t even want to say you made for some rich guy, but your electricity don’t get cut off because you’re finally able to pay your bills.

It’s hard… My dad and I really face that dilemma almost every day. It’s really not easy when art and business have to go together. You can’t be a snooty designer insisting to the client, “it’s art,” but there are things that you can’t entirely allow, such as really horrid things like an olive green-and-fuschia-polka-dots-and-starry-starry background or something. There are times you have to put your foot down, and yet sometimes you have to give in (sometimes even for a fee). As much as I don’t want to admit it, it’s a job. Meaning, there are times that you don’t like it.

Apart from the pressure of deadlines, I got troubles at home that I have to worry about. But those troubles will only worsen if I just start feeling sorry for myself, too depressed to do anything. I know that. But I can’t deny that this is really psychologically, if not mentally, draining. I sometimes get to the point where I’m just staring at a blank Photoshop canvass, not knowing what to do. At this rate, the weekly movie dates Marc and I swore to have aren’t enough for me to relax and maintain my creativity.

Luckily, Marc and I found a way.

I’m doing traditional graphic design again. Graphic design using pen and paper.

Marc bought me the favorite tech pens I used to have (I drew often when I was in grade school and high school, particularly during class hehe), and a sketchpad. He got me pencils too. So now I have a new hobby. Marc didn’t mind buying the expensive pens. After all, drawing is doing my temper a lot of good. Hehe. I’ve been throwing lesser tantrums lately, I don’t freak out during times of deadlines anymore! And that’s a HELL LOT of improvement, I’m telling you. Haha. Ask Marc, he’ll agree with me.

If you guys also noticed, my blogs are becoming longer. Hehe. Let’s just say I’m tapping all possible venues to keep my creativity intact. A lot of people are dependent on this creativity: me, my family, my company, my partners, my clients. I can’t afford to screw it up. But now I can say I’m doing ok so far. I haven’t had any creativity blocks since I started drawing and writing again. You guys should try that. Hehe. I read your blogs too, you know. Once in a blue moon, I would leave a message. I don’t know, I’m really just not the commenting type. )

I’ll tell you guys soon what I did for my birthday, and nice presents I got. But not right now. I want to give that story justice, so I’ll dedicate a separate entry just for that. Thank you for the greetings, by the way. )

My dogs are ok… Sheero’s sweeter lately, but it’s probably because she’s cold that’s why she’s cuddling up more often. Choknat, well, he’s still gay. Harry… Well, something’s wrong with that dog too. He and Choknat will be two years old this coming January, and he STILL likes chewing objects. From what I know of NORMAL dogs, they only do that when their teeth are currently growing. Basically, only puppies do that. Harry’s no longer a pup. So it’s abnormal. Anybody out there knows dog psychology? A little advice would be very much appreciated LOL.

Thank you again to everyone who voted… I hope you will continue voting! Hehehe.

See you.

A thankful entry

5 October 2005     •     Comments Off on A thankful entry
Family Stuff

I thought I’d start off this entry in a different way…

This doesn’t go in a particular order… Some of the people and stuff I’m grateful for.

  • I lived to be 24 this October
    I’m broke, but at least I’m going to live to see my 24th birthday, which is this coming Saturday, October 8.
  • I’m still sane
    With the crap we’re going through, I’m thankful that my Dad and I haven’t cracked yet.
  • The 8th Philippine Web Awards
    Kutitots got in the semis. Of course, I told my Mom and Dad about it. The news gave them a reason to smile even if we’re going through hard times.
  • Encouraging emails and comments from people who read my blog
    Yes, I’m very thankful. Thank you, guys. Your messages meant a lot ) Thank you for your prayers too. My sister is slowly getting better again. We might not need to admit her in the Metro Psych facility.
  • My job
    Although my job and the business I helped put up are quite demanding, they pay our bills. Not everybody has a job/business, and I’m glad to have both.
  • My pets
    I have a spoiled brat (Sheero), a gay (Choknat), and a retard (Harry) for pet dogs, I’m glad that they help cheer me up when I’m not feeling my best. They cuddle up to me or simply sleep beside me… I appreciate the company, as well as the company of 7 little pups who have claimed the space below my desk as their refuge. Of course, I’m also grateful for the 11 other dogs, even if they’re not mine, they help my sister, Dad, and Mom be happy.
  • My family
    They have always supported me in all my endeavors: my art ever since I’ve learned to pick up a crayon, sports in grade school and high school, computer addiction and extra-curricular activities in college, and now my job and business. I’m also thankful because they’re my family, in good times and in bad.
  • My Marc
    I am very thankful for my best friend who is willing to spend the rest of his life with me, who puts up with all my quirks and temper tantrums, who helps me to the point of sometimes having to take over when I’m too tired to work, and who loves me no matter how evil I can be sometimes, loving me as I am.

In case you’re wondering… No, this isn’t one of those forwarded messages you get in emails. I honestly don’t read those things. I don’t know what came over me, but I just really felt like making a “thankful” entry.

Oh and yeah… I almost forgot. Please vote for Kutitots for the People’s Choice Awards in the Personal Category. Text WEBBYS VOTE 85 to 2973 for Globe and Touchmobile subscribers or 283 for Smart or Talk & Text. That’s only Php2.50 per text . Pleasssssseeeeeeee! Hehe )

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