I know most of you will agree with me when I say this: being constipated is one of the worst feelings in the world.

Wikipedia says:

Constipation or Irregularity, is a condition of the digestive system where a person (or animal) experiences hard feces that are difficult to eliminate; it may be extremely painful, and in severe cases (fecal impaction) lead to symptoms of bowel obstruction. Obstipation refers to severe constipation. Causes of constipation may be dietary, hormonal, a side effect of medications, and anatomical. Treatment is with a change in dietary habits, laxatives, fiber therapy, enemas, and rarely surgery.

I haven’t taken a shit in about three days already. Man, I so hope that the only treatment I’ll need is “change in dietary habits,” or even better, “laxatives.” Anyway, I’m pretty sure everyone has experienced feeling constipated at least once in their lives—if you haven’t, that’s kinda weird, or you just have an insanely healthy diet. Well, if you really haven’t, I’ll tell you.

You get this terrible feeling in your stomach (“blended” wastes wanting to go out), you sit on the toilet bowl, but then… Nothing comes out!!! Your friggin’ shit just won’t get out. I’ve been having that feeling for the past three days now, and it’s been a torture. I’ve been drinking gallons of water a day (ok, maybe I’m exaggerating, BUT STILL), but I still can’t shit properly. As much as possible, I try not to take laxatives, or anything that will force me to shit. Shitting way too often isn’t a happy feeling too, you know (I feel like I’m being drained when that happens). Well, if I STILL can’t shit properly by tomorrow, I’m taking laxatives.

Maybe it’s because of the coffee? Yeah, maybe that’s it.

Anyway, physical constipation isn’t the only thing that’s been bugging me. I think I’m also having a design and writing constipation too (commonly called Designer’s Block and Writer’s Block :D). The thoughts are there, but they just won’t come out in words. I’ve been working on a document for the WordPress Codex, and all I’ve come up with for the past week is just three measly lines—and they’re not even complete sentences! I’m far from done with my article for PixelBureau, and even my designing “speed” has decreased unreasonably. I can’t come up with new designs for the business my sister and I are putting up as well. I guess it’s lucky that I’ve been doing web/graphics design for almost 9 years now—I can’t afford having a constipation of that too! If that happens, I’m not only dead, but BROKE too 😛

I don’t know. Maybe I’m just really stressed out. And MAYBE I just need a movie fix to de-stress. Marc honey, are you reading this? 😀